31 Weeks and Sideways

Based on my extensive medical training, I think this baby is transverse. It's pretty uncomfortable, but not any more uncomfortable than a baby that is head down. Just different uncomfortable. I don't have any feet in my ribs, which is a plus. Here's why I think that:
1. I don't have any feet in my ribs. 
2. I feel a butt (or head) sticking out of my left side. 
3. I feel a head (or a butt) sticking out of my right side. 

I have trouble sleeping on my side because I am either laying on the baby's head or it's butt. Also, I think the baby is facing downwards because it is weird sitting up with feeling all kinds of movement all over my underbelly. I rarely feel any movements at the top of my belly. I don't think this is a big deal at the moment. 31 weeks is still plenty of time for a baby to shift positions. Some of my doctors feel around to find the baby's position and some don't. The last time a doctor did this, she couldn't tell where the baby was. It's little butt hides sometimes. 

I had an appointment last Wednesday and all was fine. We filled out the paperwork for the cord blood donation. I hope that works out. Then we talked about the scheduled c-section. We picked a date so I could get the same doctor that did my previous c-section. The date is August 7th. I haven't told people this yet because it is not "officially" scheduled yet. Our families will go crazy and start taking days off and all that as soon as they know anything. M is very happy to have this date, he wants to just go in and have the surgery and be done. I, the one who has to actually HAVE the surgery, am feeling pretty good about it too. I had a phase where I was going to do really try for a VBAC. But I never felt like I was going to go out of my way or lie about due dates or change doctors to get one. It will be nice to experience a regular birth. But it will also be nice to have everything worked out and the baby here after a full night of sleep. 

My birth experience with W was rough. Recap: In the hospital at 8 am to be induced, uncomfortable labor around 2 pm, crappy epidural, pushing by 7:30, stopped pushing around 10:30, c-section at midnight, "sleeping" from 2:30 to 4:30 and then awake for the day. Full story. 


Absolutely, utterly exhausting. 

It led to an emotional and upsetting post-partum hospital stay. I really, really, really don't want to go through that again. 

One thing that I kind of gloss over in the birth story is that I had no idea when W was actually born. I had no "IT'S A BOY!" moment that I had been waiting for. I never saw him covered in goo. My epidural wasn't cutting it during labor and it wasn't good enough to completely numb me for the surgery. The anesthesiologist gave me some strong stuff to get through the cutting and it made me black out for that part. Yes, I'm happy I didn't feel it. I don't blame him. He did the right thing. 

But that moment... I really want that moment. I feel like I'll get that with the scheduled surgery. I know I'd get it (and more) with a VBAC, but I feel like it I could always end up back in the OR anyway. And that is why I'm ok with the CBAC. 

14 Weeks and a heartbeat!

We had a great appointment yesterday! We didn't have to wait long and the doctor found the heartbeat right away. It was in the 160s and steady. I am still giddy about it!

After that, she threw me a curve ball. She asked, "Have you thought about delivery?" I couldn't believe she was bringing it up so early. I almost couldn't answer. Since M and I have only talked about VBAC a little and do not agree on it, I had her explain everything. The office lines up right with what I want. If I go into labor on my own, I can try to push the baby out. They will not induce me. I will have a C-section date scheduled. I am so happy they are supportive. I would LOVE to have a VBAC. I don't want to spend days in the hospital again. I don't want to deal with the recovery while having W and a baby around.

Of course, if it comes down to it, I'll be ok with another c-section. I'm not worried about it. They say planned ones are easier and recovery is better. And I'll have so much fiber in me that the poop thing is NOT going to be an issue (right?).

I think M feels better about it now. I'll send him some articles I have so he can be informed. His main issue is going through all the labor and pushing and ending up with the surgery anyway. It could still happen. But it won't be as bad as last time. If I do go into labor, we'll be at home for a while.

Telling our friends over the weekend was fun. We had W in a big brother t-shirt and lots of them didn't notice. They read the shirt and didn't get it! It was funny. We're slowly telling everyone now. I'm telling my coworkers at an office lunch today. M is telling his coworkers. I had W wear his t-shirt to daycare today. We still have to tell our siblings. We just can't get to see them! M's brother has been sick and my brothers are out of state (we'll see them in two weeks). I feel bad that they are finding out last, but they don't have to know that other people know!