40 Weeks

Hi! It's my due date! Where's that baby???

The good: I've made it to a fully cooked little (big?) baby! We're both healthy and happy. One of us is a little too happy... I am fully prepared to have a child in this house. I have cereal now.

The bad: Well, it's my due date and the baby is still in my belly. That's not why I was counting down to today!

The ugly: Me. I'm not in too bad shape, but I know poor M must think I'm gross. I'm just really a huge lump of sweat and farts that has to pee a lot. He's being nice and pushing my butt to help me get off the couch. But I'm gross and I know it.

The Appointment:
I did not gain any weight this week. This is the first thing I've had that I can find on my "what happens before labor list" that we get in childbirth class. The Drill Sergent told us that we would stop gaining weight or loose a little right before we have the baby. I am pretending that it doesn't matter that this was a morning appointment and I usually am in there right after lunch.

I measured myself with the tape before the doctor got in there because they never tell me where I am. It said 39 weeks. M said that means I have another week. I told him to never talk to me again. Then the doctor came in. She said I measured on time. I am 3-4 cm dilated and the baby is "way up there." So that's progress and I know I won't have to worry about going to the hospital and having them tell me I'm at a 1. That would suck.

I asked her about work and told her I stopped going on Friday. She said to just leave the disability forms at the front desk and they'll get them filled out for me. That's a great thing. Now I won't feel (semi)guilty about not working this week. And I can get another week out of my very crappy short term disability.

Then we started talking induction. I wanted to go as soon as possible. She said Tuesday. One of us is a doctor, so that person wins. I am currently waiting for a phone call from the nurse to get that scheduled.

Then for the fun! I got a Non Stress Test, which was awesome. I got to curl up in a huge comfy recliner and listen to the baby's heart beat for 20 minutes. M got to sit with me on a wooden chair. He had to pee, but he was afraid he'd miss something. So he just sat with me the whole time. I called my mom so she could hear the monitor and she liked it. The doctor took a look at the chart and pronounced us good. The heart beat was steady the whole time.

Next was an ultrasound to check the fluid. The baby looks SO different now. I couldn't tell what anything was, not even the head. We were on an old machine, so you can't really see much anyway, but she measured the fluid pockets and checked the position. Everything is perfect.

I guess I couldn't ask for anything more. We're both doing great, so there is no need to induce me now. That's a good thing (I keep telling myself). And with this much dilation... I could still go at any time (right?).

The emotional stuff: So, May 18th (Tuesday, induction day) is exactly one year since we found out our baby died. The worst day of my entire life. I could be leaving the hospital with a new baby one year after leaving with no baby. This is kind of hard for me to take. I told M I didn't really want the baby born on the 18th or 19th because those are bad days for me. But I also think that maybe it will be ok... I mean, it's like having a baby on Sept 11... it brings some good back into that day. Something positive.

Baby Shower!

I had a wonderful weekend!

I’d like to mention quickly that I went to see Stomp on Friday night. It was awesome. The baby was kicking and moving all over the place for the entire show. Then he/she stayed awake all night practicing the moves. That was fun, too.

My shower was on Saturday afternoon. I had such a wonderful time. We got there early so I could greet everyone as they came in. M stayed for a while, too. He was afraid to stay for the presents (he went to an auto parts store with his dad instead). We had lunch and then I opened all the gifts. Wow! We had to ask some family members to take some things home for us. We are pretty well prepared for a baby now! We have all the big stuff and most of the small stuff. We have a gift card from a furniture promotion that we need to use by the end of the month. We figured we’d go there and get a big thing with it… I think we’ll just be getting some diapers and wipes instead. I am so grateful that my family and friends are so awesome!

I cried a lot during the shower. M’s grandmother spent her winter making little blankets and sweaters and booties and hats. They are all so small and cute! I cried!

Then my mom gave me a sweater that my grandmother had made. She was a huge knitter. She would knit all day and make all these little sweaters. She would give them to anyone who was pregnant and all the rest went to the local hospital. I had been hoping there was a sweater for me somewhere… I was so happy when I opened that box. And I cried SO much. I’m still crying now. I cry whenever I look at it or tell someone about it.

Then M’s mom gave me an outfit that M’s great-grandmother had made for him. I can’t even imagine that. My baby will have something from their great-great grandmother. That is something amazing. I hope she has a picture of M in the sweater. I was giggling a little when I opened this one because I kept picturing M in this little green sweater with ribbons all through it. He must have been so cute!

My mom got us a glider. I was so excited about this sucker! The baby loves it when I sit in those things and I knew that I would be glued to it as soon as we could get it in the house. My Father-in-law sat in it while they were waiting for me to arrive. It broke. It wasn’t his fault – he’s not a huge guy or anything. And my mom was actually kind of grateful that it broke when he sat in it instead of me – or later when I was holding the baby. We returned it on Sunday morning and I hope the new one will come in before the end of this week. For those keeping track – that is 2 out of 3 furniture items that were damaged. Neat!

I was exhausted after the party. I got home and just watched Harry Potter movies all evening. I went through all the gifts on Sunday with M. He liked the toys and clothes. He didn’t really care about the rest. We decided we need a lot more storage! We are going to get a bookshelf and a storage shelf for the closet this week. Then I should be able to start putting everything into the room. It’s going to be so cute!

Then the baby barely moved all day on Sunday. It wasn’t like no movement, but just not as much as I am used to. So I was nervous all day. This morning has been nutso, though. The poor kid hates when I type, so I think I’ll end here for now.

I have an appointment at 1 pm. I’m going to ask if they can tell what position the baby is in. M is pretty busy at work, but he’s still coming to all the appointments. I read somewhere that I get a test for an infection that is done rectally at some point. M said he doesn’t want to miss that one. He’s such a lovely man.

Oh, and here’s something awesome. Almost everyone at work is sick. I hear sniffles all day long. People are staying away from me and I’m washing my hands and all that stuff. But I’m pretty sure I’m going to get really cranky really soon.

32 Weeks!

Special thanks to all those who shared their BFing experiences and advice and fears. I feel better!

Here is my 32 week update. 8 weeks to go... holy crap.

The good: M has been feeling the baby regularly. He talks to the baby and all that great stuff. My big shower is this weekend! My new crib is being delivered this afternoon!

The bad: I am getting more and more uncomfortable every day. I am also getting angrier at the people around me (this might not be a bad thing)

The ugly: I am preparing for a child by spitting up a few times a day. Really. Out of nowhere. I don’t even get a burpy feeling, I just burp out a bunch of water. I have yet to make a mess or anything, but it’s still gross (read: I throw up in my mouth). I’m sure this is related to my fantastic heartburn and acid reflux problem, but the spitting up doesn’t hurt at all. It just gives me bad breath.

Normal life: I had a dentist appointment this morning. The hygienist talked to me about nursing the whole time. Does she read my blog? I have fluoride breath right now and it is gross.

{Drama Removed}

Pediatrician: I have one! I had a meet and great yesterday afternoon. He is a jolly man in a bugs bunny tie. He talked to me for about 40 minutes and made sure all my questions are answered. I didn’t see eye-to-eye with him on all the vaccine stuff, but he said several parents are on the schedule that I am interested in (Dr Sears). Why am I interested in the alternative vaccine schedule? My mom said she liked it better. I’m currently reading (skimming) the book and I agree with it. That doesn’t mean any other approach is wrong.

30 week apointment

I had my 30 week appointment today and all is well. It took a minute or two to catch the heartbeat, but I could hear it for a second before it moved. Plus, the baby had been kicking me during the wait for the doctor. That makes the heartbeat search so much easier!

The specifics:

The baby’s heart rate is in the 130s, same as last time.

I am only slightly anemic – the number is 34. Here is an article my mom sent me about the levels. I still don’t really understand it, but it’s not very bad.

The doctor was impressed that I found a place for cord blood donation. Every time I’ve asked them for donation information, they gave me a card for Viacord. In my research, I realized it was because Maryland doesn’t have any local donation facilities. The best I can do is the online place. She wants more information about the bank and hopefully this will work out and more moms will be able to donate. As for their office, no one is sure what the office will do about fees. I will call and find out what the fees are for normal banking so I won’t get surprised. Then I’ll ask what they would do for a donation – most websites say that the collection should be free if you donate the cord blood. I don’t mind paying a small fee, but I’m not going to be charged more than $100 for a good deed.

In other news, I had my office baby shower on Friday (background here).

{Drama Removed}

So, right, the shower itself was very nice. I am blessed to have generous coworkers who contributed to get me a lot of great gifts! I couldn’t believe it! We had lots of great food (ordered in as our normal 1st Friday lunch) and lots of desserts! I love desserts. A coworker’s wife made a cake for me with frogs on it. Very cute ad yummy. Another coworker brought in the cutest cupcakes I have ever seen. The conference room was decorated so nicely!!! If I get pictures of these things, I’ll post them. M was there to celebrate and that was nice (and having him there made it better to talk about it afterwards). Most of the men in my office (that means most of the people in my office) have never been to a baby shower before. Only 2-3 even have young kids. The look on my boss’s face when I opened the boppy pillow was priceless. He had NO idea what that was for. And I wasn’t going to tell him.

{More drama removed}

The not-so-exciting shower

I have a work shower coming up. Soon. Like Friday soon.

{drama removed}

For the record, I don’t have any of these fears about my real shower, where I will be surrounded by women that I really like and will be a great time.